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50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened

Started by Aerlys, January 21, 2015, 01:24:10 PM

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lenni

Quote from: Aerlys on January 22, 2015, 02:10:03 PM
Quote from: revanne on January 22, 2015, 03:48:55 AM
Can't quote properly on this tablet but my cats take exception to Evie's remark. They wish it to be clearly understood that everything a cat does is by definition purrfect, even grammar. They suggest you clearly meant to type "dog"

Perhaps cats across the pond are just naturally more articulate than their American counterparts? 



I think that Shakespeare Kitten's typist forgot a comma. What Shakespeare Kitten actually dictated was, "Shakespeare Kitten dost not approve of thou, foul grammar."

Evie

Quote from: lenni on January 22, 2015, 11:11:07 PM
Quote from: Aerlys on January 22, 2015, 02:10:03 PM
Quote from: revanne on January 22, 2015, 03:48:55 AM
Can't quote properly on this tablet but my cats take exception to Evie's remark. They wish it to be clearly understood that everything a cat does is by definition purrfect, even grammar. They suggest you clearly meant to type "dog"

Perhaps cats across the pond are just naturally more articulate than their American counterparts? 



I think that Shakespeare Kitten's typist forgot a comma. What Shakespeare Kitten actually dictated was, "Shakespeare Kitten dost not approve of thou, foul grammar."

Ah, but in that case the sentence would need to say "dost not approve of thee," unless Shakespeare Kitten's point is that he disapproves of grammar so much that he refuses to bother with it at all.  ;D

Thou - subject.   Thou shalt use proper grammar.
Thee- object.  Shakespeare Kitten disapproves of thee.
Thy- possessive pronoun in front of word that doesn't begin with a vowel sound. Thy quill stands at the ready, Master Shakespeare Kitten.
Thine- possessive pronoun in front of word beginning with vowel sound.  Thine inkwell is dry, alas, so thy treatise on grammar shall have to wait.
"In necessariis unitas, in non-necessariis libertas, in utrisque caritas."

--WARNING!!!--
I have a vocabulary in excess of 75,000 words, and I'm not afraid to use it!

Aerlys

#17
Quote from: Evie on January 22, 2015, 02:26:15 PM
Methinks Shakespeare Kitten is an imposter, otherwise he would say "thy foul grammar."   ;D


"Loss and possession, death and life are one, There falls no shadow where there shines no sun."

Hilaire Belloc

revanne

Or as I remember from Romeo and Juliet "bites his thumb".
God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.
(Psalm 46 v1)

Aerlys

Alas, I do not write them, nor may I modify them. I only post them.
"Loss and possession, death and life are one, There falls no shadow where there shines no sun."

Hilaire Belloc

Elkhound


Evie

Not opposable thumbs, but maybe the finger (not sure what it's called on a cat) nearest to the inside of each paw counts for the purpose.  When my cats splay their paws out to clean between their claws, they look pretty hand-like to me, despite not being as versatile as the human hand.

Or maybe the dewclaw counts as a cat thumb, even though it's not opposable either. My cats chew there sometimes, and I've always assumed they were just grooming, but maybe they're really "biting their thumbs" at me!  :o
"In necessariis unitas, in non-necessariis libertas, in utrisque caritas."

--WARNING!!!--
I have a vocabulary in excess of 75,000 words, and I'm not afraid to use it!

lenni

Quote from: Evie on January 23, 2015, 06:48:11 AM
Quote from: lenni on January 22, 2015, 11:11:07 PM
I think that Shakespeare Kitten's typist forgot a comma. What Shakespeare Kitten actually dictated was, "Shakespeare Kitten dost not approve of thou, foul grammar."

Ah, but in that case the sentence would need to say "dost not approve of thee," unless Shakespeare Kitten's point is that he disapproves of grammar so much that he refuses to bother with it at all.  ;D

Thou - subject.   Thou shalt use proper grammar.
Thee- object.  Shakespeare Kitten disapproves of thee.
Thy- possessive pronoun in front of word that doesn't begin with a vowel sound. Thy quill stands at the ready, Master Shakespeare Kitten.
Thine- possessive pronoun in front of word beginning with vowel sound.  Thine inkwell is dry, alas, so thy treatise on grammar shall have to wait.

Darn it, Evie! You're making too much sense. (Thank you!)

Evie

#23
Thou'rt welcome!   ;D (And on a related note, the reason we don't use those art / shalt / dost (etc.) verbs anymore is that they were linked to "thou," which we've all but dropped from the language except when quoting Shakespeare, the King James Bible, or trying to impress one's pastor with how pious one can sound in prayer.  ;) )
"In necessariis unitas, in non-necessariis libertas, in utrisque caritas."

--WARNING!!!--
I have a vocabulary in excess of 75,000 words, and I'm not afraid to use it!

Elkhound

Some polydactyl cats (Hemmingway Cats) almost have thumbs.

Aerlys

#25
Quote from: Elkhound on January 23, 2015, 09:18:49 PM
Some polydactyl cats (Hemmingway Cats) almost have thumbs.

Hemmingway? I thought we were quoting Shakespeare.   :o

I wonder what kind of thumbs a Dickens cat has. Does a Chaucer cat have a big grin?   ;D
"Loss and possession, death and life are one, There falls no shadow where there shines no sun."

Hilaire Belloc

Jerusha

Quote from: Aerlys on January 23, 2015, 10:34:18 PM
Quote from: Elkhound on January 23, 2015, 09:18:49 PM
Some polydactyl cats (Hemmingway Cats) almost have thumbs.

I wonder what kind of thumbs a Dickens cat has. Does a Chaucer cat have a big grin?   ;D

A Chaucer cat may or may not have a big grin, but I'm sure it has a tail to tell.   ;D
From ghoulies and ghosties and long-leggity beasties and things that go bump in the night...good Lord deliver us!

 -- Old English Litany

Evie

Quote from: Jerusha on January 24, 2015, 05:23:25 PM
Quote from: Aerlys on January 23, 2015, 10:34:18 PM
Quote from: Elkhound on January 23, 2015, 09:18:49 PM
Some polydactyl cats (Hemmingway Cats) almost have thumbs.

I wonder what kind of thumbs a Dickens cat has. Does a Chaucer cat have a big grin?   ;D

A Chaucer cat may or may not have a big grin, but I'm sure it has a tail to tell.   ;D

Chaucer cats are closely related to Canterbury cats, which have all sorts of tails....   ;)
"In necessariis unitas, in non-necessariis libertas, in utrisque caritas."

--WARNING!!!--
I have a vocabulary in excess of 75,000 words, and I'm not afraid to use it!

Elkhound

It is Dodgeson cats that have the grins.