collapse

Author Topic: For (another) friend's family and loved ones  (Read 4495 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline DesertRose

  • Administrator
  • ******
  • Posts: 2097
  • Karma: 26
  • Gender: Female
  • Favorite Book: Deryni Magic
  • Favorite Character: Rhys Thuryn *sob*
For (another) friend's family and loved ones
« on: November 19, 2014, 03:55:06 PM »
A friend of mine (not the one I posted about earlier this fall) passed away unexpectedly, probably either Sunday or Monday.  She posted to Facebook on Saturday (a perfectly normal-for-her post), and then Monday a friend went to pick her up for a doctor's appointment (she was temporarily unable to drive due to recent knee surgery) and found her body.

I'm waiting to hear about details of a memorial service.  Apparently, there will be two, one here in Florida where she lived her last years, and one in New York, which is where she was from and most of her family is still there.

I'm almost too shocked yet to be sad about it all.  She was not a particularly young woman, but neither was she of an age to just die like this.  (She was probably in her late 40s or early 50s.)

But if I feel this shocked and upset about her death, I'm sure it's nothing to what her family and closer friends are feeling now, in addition to having to plan memorials and disposition of remains and the other administrative nightmare details that attend upon a death, expected or not.

So if y'all could hold up her family and friends in this difficult time, I'd appreciate it.
"If having a soul means being able to feel love, loyalty, and gratitude, then animals are better off than a lot of humans."

James Herriot (James Alfred "Alfie" Wight), when a human client asked him if animals have souls.  (I don't remember in which book the story originally appeared.)

Offline revanne

  • Community Supporter
  • *****
  • Posts: 1798
  • Karma: 18
  • Gender: Female
  • Favorite Book: King Javan's Year
  • Favorite Character: Father Joram MacRorie
Re: For (another) friend's family and loved ones
« Reply #1 on: November 19, 2014, 04:20:40 PM »
of course
God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.
(Psalm 46 v1)

Offline DesertRose

  • Administrator
  • ******
  • Posts: 2097
  • Karma: 26
  • Gender: Female
  • Favorite Book: Deryni Magic
  • Favorite Character: Rhys Thuryn *sob*
Re: For (another) friend's family and loved ones
« Reply #2 on: November 19, 2014, 04:35:04 PM »
Thank you, revanne.
"If having a soul means being able to feel love, loyalty, and gratitude, then animals are better off than a lot of humans."

James Herriot (James Alfred "Alfie" Wight), when a human client asked him if animals have souls.  (I don't remember in which book the story originally appeared.)

Offline Evie

  • Administrator
  • ******
  • Posts: 4353
  • Karma: 30
  • Gender: Female
  • Sister Evie--Servant of Saint Camber
    • The Mini-Deryni Chronicles
  • Favorite Book: High Deryni or The King's Justice (can't decide)
  • Favorite Character: President of the Duncan McLain Fanbabe Society
Re: For (another) friend's family and loved ones
« Reply #3 on: November 19, 2014, 04:42:57 PM »
So sorry to hear about your friend.  Her sudden loss must be quite a shock!  I will pray for you and her other friends and loved ones.
"In necessariis unitas, in non-necessariis libertas, in utrisque caritas."

--WARNING!!!--
I have a vocabulary in excess of 75,000 words, and I'm not afraid to use it!

Offline DesertRose

  • Administrator
  • ******
  • Posts: 2097
  • Karma: 26
  • Gender: Female
  • Favorite Book: Deryni Magic
  • Favorite Character: Rhys Thuryn *sob*
Re: For (another) friend's family and loved ones
« Reply #4 on: November 19, 2014, 08:58:31 PM »
So sorry to hear about your friend.  Her sudden loss must be quite a shock!  I will pray for you and her other friends and loved ones.

It was a great shock, because as far as I knew, the only medical problem she was having was the recently-operated-on knee, which, while annoying and painful, is not exactly life-threatening.

I feel particularly bad for the two who found her, having come over to take her to the freaking doctor.  (One person was supposed to take her to the doctor and when she didn't answer the door or the phone, he phoned another friend who had a key to her apartment, and they found her together.)

It's just a crappy situation all around.  As stated above, I'm still too shocked to be very sad yet.

Thank you for the sympathy and prayers.
"If having a soul means being able to feel love, loyalty, and gratitude, then animals are better off than a lot of humans."

James Herriot (James Alfred "Alfie" Wight), when a human client asked him if animals have souls.  (I don't remember in which book the story originally appeared.)

Offline Laurna

  • Community Supporter
  • *****
  • Posts: 2437
  • Karma: 20
  • Gender: Female
  • Favorite Book: Deryni Checkmate and King Kelson's Bride
  • Favorite Character: Alaric Morgan & Rhys Thuryn-May they be Family.
Re: For (another) friend's family and loved ones
« Reply #5 on: November 19, 2014, 09:37:15 PM »
That is awful! I am sorry!
That news makes me worry it could have been a blood clot in the legs.
Everyone should be mindful that if they have one leg swelling with warmth and slight blush of the ankle and calf ( not cold or red hot) than they should see their doctor instantly. Blood clots are curable if you take the warnings seriously.
My thoughts go to her friends and family.

Offline DesertRose

  • Administrator
  • ******
  • Posts: 2097
  • Karma: 26
  • Gender: Female
  • Favorite Book: Deryni Magic
  • Favorite Character: Rhys Thuryn *sob*
Re: For (another) friend's family and loved ones
« Reply #6 on: November 20, 2014, 09:38:05 AM »
That was my first guess too, deep vein thrombosis or pulmonary embolism, either of which can happen after surgery and be very subtle in their symptoms.

I don't think I'll ever know what happened, as there will be no autopsy.  Honestly, that surprises me.  I thought that if someone died alone, legally there had to be an autopsy, but apparently not in Florida.  (It appears to be the case in Iowa, though, because when Dawson [ambush in chat, RexKelsonus on the board] died at home alone, there was no question that there would be an autopsy, although that was a slightly different situation, and as mentioned, another state with different laws.)  And evidently either her family did not want one or she left instructions that she did not want an autopsy.  So I have to let go of my need to know what the heck happened, because that's a question that's not going to get answered.

Starting to get over the shock and heading more towards grief now, and I'm still waiting to hear about memorial service arrangements.

Thank you all for your kindness and thoughts/prayers.
"If having a soul means being able to feel love, loyalty, and gratitude, then animals are better off than a lot of humans."

James Herriot (James Alfred "Alfie" Wight), when a human client asked him if animals have souls.  (I don't remember in which book the story originally appeared.)

Offline Jerusha

  • Community Supporter
  • *****
  • Posts: 2140
  • Karma: 27
  • Gender: Female
  • Favorite Book: High Deryni
  • Favorite Character: Alaric Morgan
Re: For (another) friend's family and loved ones
« Reply #7 on: November 20, 2014, 11:21:52 AM »
I'm so sorry that you have lost your friend.  My thoughts go out to you and your friend's family and friends. 
From ghoulies and ghosties and long-leggity beasties and things that go bump in the night...good Lord deliver us!

 -- Old English Litany

Offline DesertRose

  • Administrator
  • ******
  • Posts: 2097
  • Karma: 26
  • Gender: Female
  • Favorite Book: Deryni Magic
  • Favorite Character: Rhys Thuryn *sob*
Re: For (another) friend's family and loved ones
« Reply #8 on: November 20, 2014, 11:34:20 AM »
Thank you, Jerusha.
"If having a soul means being able to feel love, loyalty, and gratitude, then animals are better off than a lot of humans."

James Herriot (James Alfred "Alfie" Wight), when a human client asked him if animals have souls.  (I don't remember in which book the story originally appeared.)

Offline lenni

  • Squire
  • ******
  • Posts: 88
  • Karma: 2
  • Gender: Female
Re: For (another) friend's family and loved ones
« Reply #9 on: November 21, 2014, 07:10:44 PM »
Oh, my! :-( I'll say prayers for her, the family, you, and the rest of her friends. How awful!

Offline DesertRose

  • Administrator
  • ******
  • Posts: 2097
  • Karma: 26
  • Gender: Female
  • Favorite Book: Deryni Magic
  • Favorite Character: Rhys Thuryn *sob*
Re: For (another) friend's family and loved ones
« Reply #10 on: December 09, 2014, 10:43:17 PM »
I went tonight to my friend's memorial service.  It was really nice.  I think she would have liked it.  She loved to sing, and they sang two songs, one I wasn't familiar with called "God Loves You," and then "New York, New York."  (She was a native New Yorker.)  The words that were said by various people in her memory were very appropriate, sweet, blunt, and at times funny.  We got a lot of that laughter-through-tears emotion coming through at the service.

Still missing her and her great sense of humor and her bluntness.  She wouldn't tell you what you wanted to hear, but sometimes it was what you needed to hear.  She was really a great person.

Thank you all for your prayers and kind thoughts.  I would appreciate it if people could remember her friends and family in their thoughts and prayers; one friend in particular (one of the ones who found her) is having a particularly difficult time with her passing because they were really close, like brother and sister close, and he could use the good thoughts/prayers.  Thank you again.
"If having a soul means being able to feel love, loyalty, and gratitude, then animals are better off than a lot of humans."

James Herriot (James Alfred "Alfie" Wight), when a human client asked him if animals have souls.  (I don't remember in which book the story originally appeared.)

Offline Evie

  • Administrator
  • ******
  • Posts: 4353
  • Karma: 30
  • Gender: Female
  • Sister Evie--Servant of Saint Camber
    • The Mini-Deryni Chronicles
  • Favorite Book: High Deryni or The King's Justice (can't decide)
  • Favorite Character: President of the Duncan McLain Fanbabe Society
Re: For (another) friend's family and loved ones
« Reply #11 on: December 10, 2014, 06:44:43 AM »
Sounds like she had a memorial that was wonderfully appropriate for her personality. I'll keep her friends and loved ones in my prayers.
"In necessariis unitas, in non-necessariis libertas, in utrisque caritas."

--WARNING!!!--
I have a vocabulary in excess of 75,000 words, and I'm not afraid to use it!

Offline DesertRose

  • Administrator
  • ******
  • Posts: 2097
  • Karma: 26
  • Gender: Female
  • Favorite Book: Deryni Magic
  • Favorite Character: Rhys Thuryn *sob*
Re: For (another) friend's family and loved ones
« Reply #12 on: December 10, 2014, 06:51:53 AM »
Sounds like she had a memorial that was wonderfully appropriate for her personality. I'll keep her friends and loved ones in my prayers.

It was, and I think she'd have liked it.

And thank you.
"If having a soul means being able to feel love, loyalty, and gratitude, then animals are better off than a lot of humans."

James Herriot (James Alfred "Alfie" Wight), when a human client asked him if animals have souls.  (I don't remember in which book the story originally appeared.)

 


* Discord

* User Info

 
 
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

* Recent Posts

Re: Two Kingdoms: Departures by revanne
[August 11, 2020, 03:33:08 AM]


Re: Two Kingdoms: Departures by DoctorM
[August 10, 2020, 08:16:47 PM]


Re: Two Kingdoms: Departures by DerynifanK
[August 10, 2020, 11:54:34 AM]


Re: Happy Birthday Derynifank! by revanne
[August 09, 2020, 09:35:57 PM]


KK Chat -- 9 August 2020 by DesertRose
[August 09, 2020, 07:41:14 PM]


Re: Two Kingdoms: Departures by Jerusha
[August 09, 2020, 12:06:55 PM]


Re: Two Kingdoms: Departures by Laurna
[August 09, 2020, 10:36:47 AM]


Re: Happy Birthday Derynifank! by HoundMistress
[August 09, 2020, 08:30:01 AM]


Re: Happy Birthday Derynifank! by Shiral
[August 08, 2020, 10:25:09 PM]


Re: Happy Birthday Derynifank! by DerynifanK
[August 08, 2020, 02:18:54 PM]


Re: Happy Birthday Derynifank! by DoctorM
[August 08, 2020, 11:42:03 AM]


Two Kingdoms: Departures by DoctorM
[August 08, 2020, 11:37:29 AM]


Re: Happy Birthday Derynifank! by Bynw
[August 08, 2020, 10:07:50 AM]


Re: Happy Birthday Derynifank! by DesertRose
[August 08, 2020, 09:22:29 AM]


Re: Happy Birthday Derynifank! by Jerusha
[August 08, 2020, 09:19:17 AM]

* Who's Online

  • Dot Guests: 9
  • Dot Hidden: 0
  • Dot Users: 0

There aren't any users online.

* Discord

* Top Poster

revanne revanne
2 Posts
Jerusha Jerusha
1 Posts
Laurna Laurna
1 Posts
DerynifanK DerynifanK
1 Posts
DoctorM DoctorM
1 Posts

* Most Karma

Evie Evie
Karma: 30
Jerusha Jerusha
Karma: 27
DesertRose DesertRose
Karma: 26
Laurna Laurna
Karma: 20
revanne revanne
Karma: 18

* Online Time

DesertRose DesertRose
127d 4h 51m
Evie Evie
123d 9h 44m
TheDeryni TheDeryni
116d 1h 15m
Bynw Bynw
82d 23h 15m
AnnieUK AnnieUK
53d 23h 8m

* Forum Staff

Bynw admin Bynw
Administrator
DesertRose admin DesertRose
Administrator
bennu admin bennu
Administrator
Evie admin Evie
Administrator

* Board Stats

  • stats Total Members: 322
  • stats Total Posts: 23148
  • stats Total Topics: 2275
  • stats Total Categories: 14
  • stats Total Boards: 147
  • stats Most Online: 930

* Calendar

August 2020
Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat
1
2 3 4 5 6 7 8
9 10 11 12 [13] 14 15
16 17 18 19 20 21 22
23 24 25 26 27 28 29
30 31

SimplePortal 2.3.7 © 2008-2020, SimplePortal