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Author Topic: 50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened  (Read 10970 times)

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Offline lenni

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Re: 50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened
« Reply #15 on: January 22, 2015, 11:11:07 pm »
Can't quote properly on this tablet but my cats take exception to Evie's remark. They wish it to be clearly understood that everything a cat does is by definition purrfect, even grammar. They suggest you clearly meant to type "dog"

Perhaps cats across the pond are just naturally more articulate than their American counterparts? 



I think that Shakespeare Kitten's typist forgot a comma. What Shakespeare Kitten actually dictated was, "Shakespeare Kitten dost not approve of thou, foul grammar."

Online Evie

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Re: 50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened
« Reply #16 on: January 23, 2015, 06:48:11 am »
Can't quote properly on this tablet but my cats take exception to Evie's remark. They wish it to be clearly understood that everything a cat does is by definition purrfect, even grammar. They suggest you clearly meant to type "dog"

Perhaps cats across the pond are just naturally more articulate than their American counterparts? 



I think that Shakespeare Kitten's typist forgot a comma. What Shakespeare Kitten actually dictated was, "Shakespeare Kitten dost not approve of thou, foul grammar."

Ah, but in that case the sentence would need to say "dost not approve of thee," unless Shakespeare Kitten's point is that he disapproves of grammar so much that he refuses to bother with it at all.  ;D

Thou - subject.   Thou shalt use proper grammar.
Thee- object.  Shakespeare Kitten disapproves of thee.
Thy- possessive pronoun in front of word that doesn't begin with a vowel sound. Thy quill stands at the ready, Master Shakespeare Kitten.
Thine- possessive pronoun in front of word beginning with vowel sound.  Thine inkwell is dry, alas, so thy treatise on grammar shall have to wait.
"In necessariis unitas, in non-necessariis libertas, in utrisque caritas."

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Offline Aerlys

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Re: 50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened
« Reply #17 on: January 23, 2015, 11:44:46 am »
Methinks Shakespeare Kitten is an imposter, otherwise he would say "thy foul grammar."   ;D


« Last Edit: January 23, 2015, 12:04:00 pm by Aerlys »
"Loss and possession, death and life are one, There falls no shadow where there shines no sun."

Hilaire Belloc

Offline revanne

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Re: 50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened
« Reply #18 on: January 23, 2015, 02:04:42 pm »
Or as I remember from Romeo and Juliet "bites his thumb".
Let God rise up, let his enemies be scattered;
    let those who hate him flee before him.
As smoke is driven away, so drive them away;
    as wax melts before the fire,
    let the wicked perish before God.
(Psalm 68 vv1-2)

Offline Aerlys

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Re: 50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened
« Reply #19 on: January 23, 2015, 02:12:39 pm »
Alas, I do not write them, nor may I modify them. I only post them.
"Loss and possession, death and life are one, There falls no shadow where there shines no sun."

Hilaire Belloc

Offline Elkhound

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Re: 50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened
« Reply #20 on: January 23, 2015, 02:15:59 pm »
But cats don't have thumbs.

Online Evie

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Re: 50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened
« Reply #21 on: January 23, 2015, 02:38:08 pm »
Not opposable thumbs, but maybe the finger (not sure what it's called on a cat) nearest to the inside of each paw counts for the purpose.  When my cats splay their paws out to clean between their claws, they look pretty hand-like to me, despite not being as versatile as the human hand.

Or maybe the dewclaw counts as a cat thumb, even though it's not opposable either. My cats chew there sometimes, and I've always assumed they were just grooming, but maybe they're really "biting their thumbs" at me!  :o
"In necessariis unitas, in non-necessariis libertas, in utrisque caritas."

--WARNING!!!--
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Offline lenni

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Re: 50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened
« Reply #22 on: January 23, 2015, 04:57:08 pm »
I think that Shakespeare Kitten's typist forgot a comma. What Shakespeare Kitten actually dictated was, "Shakespeare Kitten dost not approve of thou, foul grammar."

Ah, but in that case the sentence would need to say "dost not approve of thee," unless Shakespeare Kitten's point is that he disapproves of grammar so much that he refuses to bother with it at all.  ;D

Thou - subject.   Thou shalt use proper grammar.
Thee- object.  Shakespeare Kitten disapproves of thee.
Thy- possessive pronoun in front of word that doesn't begin with a vowel sound. Thy quill stands at the ready, Master Shakespeare Kitten.
Thine- possessive pronoun in front of word beginning with vowel sound.  Thine inkwell is dry, alas, so thy treatise on grammar shall have to wait.

Darn it, Evie! You're making too much sense. (Thank you!)

Online Evie

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Re: 50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened
« Reply #23 on: January 23, 2015, 06:10:45 pm »
Thou'rt welcome!   ;D (And on a related note, the reason we don't use those art / shalt / dost (etc.) verbs anymore is that they were linked to "thou," which we've all but dropped from the language except when quoting Shakespeare, the King James Bible, or trying to impress one's pastor with how pious one can sound in prayer.  ;) )
« Last Edit: January 23, 2015, 06:17:38 pm by Evie »
"In necessariis unitas, in non-necessariis libertas, in utrisque caritas."

--WARNING!!!--
I have a vocabulary in excess of 75,000 words, and I'm not afraid to use it!

Offline Elkhound

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Re: 50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened
« Reply #24 on: January 23, 2015, 09:18:49 pm »
Some polydactyl cats (Hemmingway Cats) almost have thumbs.

Offline Aerlys

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Re: 50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened
« Reply #25 on: January 23, 2015, 10:34:18 pm »
Some polydactyl cats (Hemmingway Cats) almost have thumbs.

Hemmingway? I thought we were quoting Shakespeare.   :o

I wonder what kind of thumbs a Dickens cat has. Does a Chaucer cat have a big grin?   ;D
« Last Edit: January 24, 2015, 12:02:27 pm by Aerlys »
"Loss and possession, death and life are one, There falls no shadow where there shines no sun."

Hilaire Belloc

Offline Jerusha

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Re: 50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened
« Reply #26 on: January 24, 2015, 05:23:25 pm »
Some polydactyl cats (Hemmingway Cats) almost have thumbs.


I wonder what kind of thumbs a Dickens cat has. Does a Chaucer cat have a big grin?   ;D

A Chaucer cat may or may not have a big grin, but I'm sure it has a tail to tell.   ;D
From ghoulies and ghosties and long-leggity beasties and things that go bump in the night...good Lord deliver us!

 -- Old English Litany

Online Evie

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Re: 50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened
« Reply #27 on: January 24, 2015, 05:38:05 pm »
Some polydactyl cats (Hemmingway Cats) almost have thumbs.


I wonder what kind of thumbs a Dickens cat has. Does a Chaucer cat have a big grin?   ;D

A Chaucer cat may or may not have a big grin, but I'm sure it has a tail to tell.   ;D

Chaucer cats are closely related to Canterbury cats, which have all sorts of tails....   ;)
"In necessariis unitas, in non-necessariis libertas, in utrisque caritas."

--WARNING!!!--
I have a vocabulary in excess of 75,000 words, and I'm not afraid to use it!

Offline Elkhound

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Re: 50 Grammar Rules for the Unenlightened
« Reply #28 on: January 24, 2015, 10:41:50 pm »
It is Dodgeson cats that have the grins.

 

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